David's Blog

Exerpt of an E-mail

In the main body I have clipped a large portion of an e-mail that I sent to Jessica. I think that it is worth keeping in my blog, because it conveyed some of what was going on with me earlier this week. Also, I want to keep it as a reminder of how I felt and a goal that I have.

I am doing better this week -- emotionally at least. One major
improvement for me was getting out my sermons that I had on tapes. They help me do this thing that I've been told to do over and over again -- STOP THINKING.

Now, instead of letting my mind wander all over the place I am either
working or listening to the sermons. It has really made my days a lot
better.

I think that your summer next year will not be nearly as hard as mine in
some ways, because I am going to be keeping close track of all the things
that I found difficult about the program and I plan to let people know ahead
of time about what they are. SW doesn't do this normally, because they feel
people will back out if fully informed. I think that is somewhat true, but
mostly BS. Lots of people will be more willing to do this program if they
know for sure that they've received full disclosure. I am that way. I think
you are too. So, I am planning on disclosing everything I can about this
program.

The first thing I plan to disclose is that the program likes its secrets a
lot and is often not honest when asked direct questions. Sometimes it is
even not honest when no questions are even asked. I find that sort of
dishonesty vexing, but I am getting somewhat used to it and intend on not
letting it affect my character. I'd rather do poorly in the program than let
my character change in a way that is further from God.

Posted by David at May 23, 2004 09:00 AM